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Showing posts from March, 2012

A Letter to my Noisy Neighbors.

Dear Neighbor,

My name is Monkkr_M and I live next door to you in a downtown apartment. I have never introduced myself formally, so I apologize for not being a little friendlier when we meet briefly in the hallway or on the elevator.

I just wanted to let you know that ever since I moved in, early March 2008, you are by FAR the loudest neighbor I have ever had. This is in direct comparison with the follow previous tenants:

When I first moved in there was a couple that seemed like the young party people. I was (and still am) more than 5 years older than they were yet we seemed to get along. We’d hang-out here and there, I’d BBQ and we’d drink. I met several other people in the building through them. All of them seemed quite displaced from normal society. Each individual had their own weird quality. From the Ugly as Sin penthouse tenant with a beating heart just under his skin and not his ribcage, who had a girlfriend I can only describe as ‘amazingly bonerific’, to the guy who got drunk…

The Pink Underwear Story...

(Originally posted on Kylie's blog - http://kayjer.com/ <--- visit her there!!!)

So because I have to keep this short, (Kylie told me to…) I thought I’d share with you all a pretty funny story that happened to me when I first moved to downtown Edmonton.
Fast Forward.
A few years prior to this event, my friends had all pooled their money together to get me a birthday present. Instead of getting me something nice that I liked, they all decided to spend over $100 at the dollar store and buy me a bunch of crap. Now they did however ask me what I wanted, to which I replied “Just get me a hoodie from American Apparel”. This would turn out to be a bad suggestion. My friends went to American Apparel and purchased my gift.
So back on track, I got the bag of crap with a plastic saw that made sawing noises, a pen the size of a badger, colored staples, a feather boa, numerous children’s toys, some chocolate….and at the very bottom of the bag, which was supposed to be my hoodie…was a pair o…

"I FUCKING HATE EDMONTON!"

These are the words that were spoken by a lady who had her car smashed early this past Sunday. Apparently someone in my building got away with a hit-n-run.
It was a crisp Sunday morning, the birds chirping, fresh air…and I in my shorts. I decided to get up early and get some errands done, so I decided to take out the trash and load up my bottle collection to take to the depot. On my 3rd or 4th time down the elevator I noticed a vehicle parked sideways in the corner, hood ajar and stern looks on the faces of the owners. One of the individuals was a lady whom by the expression on her face looked like she was taking the meanest dump in history. Face bright red with fury, fists clenched and pacing wildly back and forth. As I exited my building I could then hear her screaming “SOMEONE SMASHED MY FUCKING CAR!!” This alerted me and began a series of ring like tones in my ear; first from the pitch and whine of it, then due to loudness and obnoxiousness as she repeated it several times.

Now …

....Putting my rant-pants on. By: Kylie (First guest blogger!!!!)

Anyone who knows me “in real life” will know that I’m generally a fairly happy-go-lucky person. I’m pretty levelheaded and know when to speak up but also when to let things slide.

Thanks to the fabulous and crazy thing that is the Internet, I don’t always have to be that person online. I’m not a troll, or a flamer, and I don’t attack people for the sake of seeing reactions. But between my blog and Twitter I’m able to air my petty everyday grievances and get them off my chest and out of my head.

I’m beyond thankful to have several little release valves at my disposal, and now that I’ve upgraded my terrible BlackBerry Curve to a sleek and sexy iPhone 4S, I can tweet to my heart’s content from anywhere (and I think my increased stream activity lately proves that I’m thoroughly enjoying that).

Lately, I’ve slowly been trying to make a name for myself in Edmonton as a freelance writer/blogger/photographer, etc. I’ve been taking small steps, dipping my feet into the pool and seeing how I fi…

The Art of replying, and ignoring.

I cannot stand it when I text, tweet or e-mail someone and they don’t reply for what seems like days. Now, first off I’m going to point out that I am NOT a phone watcher constantly in need of attention, and yes I know that people have lives and can’t be at my beck and call 24/7. Now I’m one of those people who reply’s as quickly as I can, sometimes within minutes, and a little piece of me wishes others would just do the same.
Now let’s break this off into smaller pieces and dissect it. There are basically 2 types of people here. 1) The person who is like me who replies instantly or within an hour…then 2) There are the people who just simply don’t give a shit and reply whenever they feel like it.
Now as I mentioned above, there are people like me who are busy, yet make time to reply to those who write them. The key word here is make time. I make time to respond to people because I care about them. Busy or not, my time is valuable to me, so I share it with those closest to me who dese…