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The Art of replying, and ignoring.

I cannot stand it when I text, tweet or e-mail someone and they don’t reply for what seems like days. Now, first off I’m going to point out that I am NOT a phone watcher constantly in need of attention, and yes I know that people have lives and can’t be at my beck and call 24/7. Now I’m one of those people who reply’s as quickly as I can, sometimes within minutes, and a little piece of me wishes others would just do the same.
Now let’s break this off into smaller pieces and dissect it. There are basically 2 types of people here. 1) The person who is like me who replies instantly or within an hour…then 2) There are the people who just simply don’t give a shit and reply whenever they feel like it.
Now as I mentioned above, there are people like me who are busy, yet make time to reply to those who write them. The key word here is make time. I make time to respond to people because I care about them. Busy or not, my time is valuable to me, so I share it with those closest to me who deserve time. Those people are just like me. They in turn make time and share it with me, because even though I am busy, I enjoy their company and appreciate the fact that they are willing to do the same for me. The people I never get replies from are simply a waste of space, ignorant and self-centered.
I am not a stupid individual and I realize the basic human tendencies to forget or misplace texts, replies or whatever. So telling me ‘I was too busy’ is not an excuse. I am busy and I make time to respond. So either you think I’m a village idiot or you are not willing to share your time with me. I’m a big boy; I can take a hint and am able to distinguish when someone is filling my verbal safe zone with pure bullshit. Too assume I am too ignorant to realize this makes you more of a raging toolaholic. I dislike these individuals. I am constantly being told the following excuses: “you try having a kid and see what happens…” – “I’m too busy” – “I forgot”…e.t.c. Fine. Those work in a limited span, but hearing it over and over again to an insanely redundant pace makes me think you think I am a moron. I am not. I am not a dog that you need to repeat your excuses to. I have friends who have kids and reply to me, so that tells me you are an unfit parent, or need to stop having kids because you are clearly a walking baby pez dispenser.
Now granted I’m being a little harsh, but I think these “non-repliers” are getting off scott-free. I completely understand having children is more than a full-time job. While I do not have kids of my own, I do have many friends that have kids, and I was once a kid and I know what a fury of adrenaline in a prick form I was…so I am intelligent enough to grasp that concept, however making it sound like you’re the octomom when you have 1 or 2 children makes me think you’re a pussy. Now I’m talking about friends who are a couple, single parents I know it’s twice as hard. I’m not downplaying your struggle by any means; I applaud your hard work.
Why do I think this? Well for one, let’s break this down a little further. With the invention of the text message (SMS) it has become a lot easier to stay in touch. Within seconds you can relay your thoughts, whereabouts or funny jokes to a friend or friends. Now these friends talk. Sometimes without you even knowing about it. So when I text Joe and tell him I like Samantha and Joe tells me to text Samantha that I like her, and I do, and she doesn’t reply, yet sends Joe a message minutes later and keeps me waiting for days, Joe tends to tell me this shit. So I know you can read English, and I know you got my message so why ignore it? This makes you a jackass. The same with twitter. The SMS based website where you can post whatever you want as long as it’s within 140 characters. I can see you tweeting back everyone else but me. Do I call you out? No. There’s no point? I get the hint you think I’m a dick or whatever, fine, I can take it. I’m not one to judge others just because they dislike something/someone. I do however find it a huge issue when days or weeks later you need something and come sucking up.
Sometimes I feel these so-called “friends” are not that at all. It’s easy to hide behind usernames, handles, phone numbers, but deep down I know what you’re all about. Believe me… I’ve been around. I wasn’t just born yesterday, and don’t fall for all of the same old tricks.
Over the years I’ve had to “break-up” (for lack of a better term) with friends of mine who just wouldn’t reply to messages or were too busy. I let go a dear friend of mine recently who I loved…but she just didn’t have time for me. We lost touch of each other years ago, and we finally reconnected via Facebook (#gagmewithapinecone) and make an oath to never loose touch again. We had many a night of hanging out and re-adjusting to friendship but then went through another span of not talking; due mainly to her not replying. The follow-up text usually went something like “Sorry for not replying sooner but…this and this happened and yea…” e.t.c. And like I mentioned above, busy is FINE… I’m not saying don’t be busy, but you need to stop and take a look around once in a while, or you’re going to lose a lot of people that care about you. It may come down to a time when you really need someone and most of them won’t be there because you wouldn’t even take 2 seconds to reply to a message. Even saying “I’m busy, are you free later?” would suffice for me… but no, the ignoring thing just doesn’t work for me. I don’t do it to others so I won’t allow it to happen to me. I am a pretty rad person, so I think I should demand a little attention here and there. So, in closing… if you can’t reply, at least tell people ahead of time…. Make SOME effort to show you care… because you never know when you’ll need them, and because of what happened with my ‘friend’, I won’t be there for her in the future. Not because I don’t care, but because she was given the chance to change and correct things, to have a friendly relationship and she chose to ignore me. So I have no hard feelings, it’s her choice…I don’t hate or have hatred towards those who makes their own decisions, it’s just them being who they are. If they feel badly about it, that means they don’t like hurting others or aren’t like that… then make a change! Change for the better. If you want to be my friend…chances are you’ll reply when I write you, those who don’t get left behind.


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